FW: Fw: New Drugs for Women

D A M N I T O L

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Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.

E M P T Y N E S T R O G E N

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Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by

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reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers

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and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.

S T. M O M M A'S W O R T

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Plant extract that treats mom's depression by

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rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.

P E P T O B I M B O

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Liquid silicone drink for single women.

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Two full cups swallowed before an evening out

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increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.

D U M B E R O L

When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ,

resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.

F L I P I T O R

Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling

road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

M E N I C I L L I N

Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance

to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person."

BUYAGRA

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Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping.

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Increases potency,duration, and credit limit of spending spree.

J A C K A S S P I R I N

Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember

your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.

A N T I-T A L K S I D E N T

A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone

too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.

N A G A M E N T

When administered to a boyfriend or husband,

provides the same irritation level as nagging him.

Now, send these to any woman who needs a good laugh,

and any man who can handle it.