Subject: Preparation for Christmas
To: All Parentscc: Good little boys and girls
From: Santa Claus
Re: Contract Negotiations, NORTH POLE
I regret to inform you that, effective immediately, I will no longer be ableto serve the Southern United States on Christmas Eve. Due to the overwhelming population of the earth, my contract was renegotiated by North American Fairies and Elves Local #209. I now serve only certain areas of Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Wisconsin and Michigan and Montana. As part of the new and better contract, I also get longer breaks for milk and cookies so keep that in mind. However, I am certain that your children will be in good hands with your local replacement who happens to be my third cousin, Bubba Claus. His side of the family is from the South Pole. He shares my goal of delivering toys to all the good boys and girls. However, there are a few differences between us. Such as:
1. There is no danger of The Grinch stealing your presents from Bubba Claus. He has a gun rack on his sleigh and a bumper sticker that reads: "These toys insured by Smith and Wesson."
2. Instead of milk and cookies, Bubba Claus prefers that children leave an RC cola and pork rinds [or a moon pie] on the fireplace. And Bubba doesn't smoke a pipe. He dips a little snuff though, so please have an empty spit can handy.
3. Bubba Claus' sleigh is pulled by floppy-eared, flyin' coon dogs instead of reindeer. I made the mistake of loaning him a couple of my reindeer one time, and Blitzen's head now overlooks Bubba's fireplace.
4. You won't hear "On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen..." when Bubba Claus arrives. Instead, you'll hear, "On Earnhardt, on Wallace, on Martin and Labonte. On Rudd, on Jarrett, on Elliott and Petty."
5. "Ho, ho, ho!" has been replaced by "Yee Haw!" And you also are likely to hear Bubba's elves respond, "I her'd dat!"
6. As required by Southern highway laws, Bubba Claus' sleigh does have a Yosemite Sam safety triangle on the back with the words "Back off". The last I heard it also had other decorations on the sleigh as well. One is a Ford logo with lights that race through the letters.
7. The usual Christmas movie classics such as "Miracle on 34th Street" and "It's a Wonderful Life" will not be shown in your negotiated viewing area. Instead, you'll see "Boss Hogg Saves Christmas" and "Smokey and theBandit IV" featuring Burt Reynolds as Bubba Claus and dozens of state patrol cars crashing into each other.
8. Bubba Claus doesn't wear a belt. If I were you, I'd make sure the wife and the kids turn the other way when he bends over to put presents under the tree.
9. And finally, lovely Christmas songs have been sung about me like "Rudolph The Red-nosed Reindeer" and Bing Crosby's "Santa Claus Is Coming toTown." This year songs about Bubba Claus will be played on all the AM radio stations in the South. Those song titles will be Mark Chesnutt's "Bubba Claus Shot the Jukebox"; Cledus T. Judd's "All I Want for Christmas Is My Woman and a Six Pack", and Hank Williams Jr.'s "If You Don't Like Bubba Claus, Shove It."
Sincerely Yours,
Santa Claus,
(Member) North American Fairies and Elves Local #209
Showing posts with label Christmas and the Holidays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christmas and the Holidays. Show all posts
12.24.2006
*Martha Stewart's Holiday Calendar*
December 1
Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray paint gold, turn upside down anduse as a sleigh to hold Christmas cards.
December 2
Have Mormon Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine.
December 3
Using candlewick and handgilded miniature pinecones, fashion cat-o-nine tails. Flog gardener.
December 4
Repaint Sistine Chapel ceiling in ecru, with mocha trim.
December 5
Get new eyeglasses. Grind lenses myself.
December 6
Fax family Christmas newsletter to Pulitzer committee for consideration.
December 7
Debug Windows XP.
December 10
Align carpets to adjust for curvature of Earth.
December 11
Lay Faberge egg.
December 12
Take dog apart. Disinfect. Reassemble.
December 13
Collect dentures. They make excellent pastry cutters, particularly for decorative pie crusts.
December 14
Install plumbing in gingerbread house.
December 15
Replace air in mini-van tires with Glade "holiday scents" in case tires are shot out at mall.
December 17
Child proof the Christmas tree with garland of razor wire.
December 19
Adjust legs of chairs so each Christmas dinner guest will be same height when sitting at his or her assigned seat.
December 20
Dip sheep and cows in egg whites and roll in confectioner's sugar to add a festive touch to the pasture.
December 21
Drain city reservoir; refill with mulled cider, orange slices, and cinnamon sticks.
December 22
Float votive candles in toilet.
December 23
Seed clouds for white Christmas.
December 24
Do my annual good deed. Go to several stores. Be seen engaged in last minute Christmas shopping, thus making many people feel less inadequate than they really are.
December 25
Bear son. Swaddle. Lay in color coordinated manger scented with homemade potpourri.
December 26
Organize spice racks by genus and phyllum.
December 27
Build snowman in exact likeness of God.
December 31
New Year's Eve! Give staff their resolutions. Call a friend in each time zone of the world as the clock strikes midnight in that country.
Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray paint gold, turn upside down anduse as a sleigh to hold Christmas cards.
December 2
Have Mormon Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine.
December 3
Using candlewick and handgilded miniature pinecones, fashion cat-o-nine tails. Flog gardener.
December 4
Repaint Sistine Chapel ceiling in ecru, with mocha trim.
December 5
Get new eyeglasses. Grind lenses myself.
December 6
Fax family Christmas newsletter to Pulitzer committee for consideration.
December 7
Debug Windows XP.
December 10
Align carpets to adjust for curvature of Earth.
December 11
Lay Faberge egg.
December 12
Take dog apart. Disinfect. Reassemble.
December 13
Collect dentures. They make excellent pastry cutters, particularly for decorative pie crusts.
December 14
Install plumbing in gingerbread house.
December 15
Replace air in mini-van tires with Glade "holiday scents" in case tires are shot out at mall.
December 17
Child proof the Christmas tree with garland of razor wire.
December 19
Adjust legs of chairs so each Christmas dinner guest will be same height when sitting at his or her assigned seat.
December 20
Dip sheep and cows in egg whites and roll in confectioner's sugar to add a festive touch to the pasture.
December 21
Drain city reservoir; refill with mulled cider, orange slices, and cinnamon sticks.
December 22
Float votive candles in toilet.
December 23
Seed clouds for white Christmas.
December 24
Do my annual good deed. Go to several stores. Be seen engaged in last minute Christmas shopping, thus making many people feel less inadequate than they really are.
December 25
Bear son. Swaddle. Lay in color coordinated manger scented with homemade potpourri.
December 26
Organize spice racks by genus and phyllum.
December 27
Build snowman in exact likeness of God.
December 31
New Year's Eve! Give staff their resolutions. Call a friend in each time zone of the world as the clock strikes midnight in that country.
12.23.2006
Twas' the Soldier's Night Before Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas,
He lived all alone,
In a one bedroom house made of
Plaster and stone.
I had come down the chimney
With presents to give,
And to see just who
In this home did live.
I looked all about,
A strange sight I did see,
No tinsel, no presents,
Not even a tree.
No stocking by the mantle,
Just boots filled with sand,
And on the wall pictures
Of far distant lands.
With medals and badges,
Awards of all kinds,
A sobering thought
Came to my mind.
For this house was different,
So dark and so dreary,
The home of a soldier,
Now I could see clearly.
The soldier lay sleeping,
Silent, alone,
Curled up on the floor
In this one bedroom home.
The face was so gentle,
The room in such disorder,
Not how I pictured
A United States Soldier.
Was this the hero
Of whom I'd just read?
Curled up on a pancho,
The floor for a bed?
I realized the families
That I saw this night,
Owed their lives to these soldiers
Who were willing to fight.
Soon round the world,
The children would play,
And grownups would celebrate
A bright Christmas day.
They all enjoyed freedom
Each month of the year,
Because of the soldiers,
Like the one lying here.
I couldn't help wonder
How many lay alone,
On a cold Christmas Eve
In a land far from home.
The very thought
Brought a tear to my eye,
I dropped to my knees
And started to cry.
The soldier awakened
And I heard a rough voice,
"Santa don't cry,
This life is my choice;
I fight for freedom,
I don't ask for more,
My life is my God,
My country, my corps."
The soldier rolled over
And soon drifted to sleep,
I couldn't control it,
I continued to weep.
I kept watch for hours,
So silent and still,
And we both shivered
From the cold evening's chill.
I didn't want to leave
On that cold, dark night,
This guardian of honor
So willing to fight.
Then the soldier rolled over,
With a voice soft and pure,
Whispered, "Carry on Santa,
It's Christmas Day, all is secure."
One look at my watch,
And I knew he was right.
"Merry Christmas my friend,
And to all a good night."
*Thank you for the touching forward Bob, Frankfort, Kentucky*
He lived all alone,
In a one bedroom house made of
Plaster and stone.
I had come down the chimney
With presents to give,
And to see just who
In this home did live.
I looked all about,
A strange sight I did see,
No tinsel, no presents,
Not even a tree.
No stocking by the mantle,
Just boots filled with sand,
And on the wall pictures
Of far distant lands.
With medals and badges,
Awards of all kinds,
A sobering thought
Came to my mind.
For this house was different,
So dark and so dreary,
The home of a soldier,
Now I could see clearly.
The soldier lay sleeping,
Silent, alone,
Curled up on the floor
In this one bedroom home.
The face was so gentle,
The room in such disorder,
Not how I pictured
A United States Soldier.
Was this the hero
Of whom I'd just read?
Curled up on a pancho,
The floor for a bed?
I realized the families
That I saw this night,
Owed their lives to these soldiers
Who were willing to fight.
Soon round the world,
The children would play,
And grownups would celebrate
A bright Christmas day.
They all enjoyed freedom
Each month of the year,
Because of the soldiers,
Like the one lying here.
I couldn't help wonder
How many lay alone,
On a cold Christmas Eve
In a land far from home.
The very thought
Brought a tear to my eye,
I dropped to my knees
And started to cry.
The soldier awakened
And I heard a rough voice,
"Santa don't cry,
This life is my choice;
I fight for freedom,
I don't ask for more,
My life is my God,
My country, my corps."
The soldier rolled over
And soon drifted to sleep,
I couldn't control it,
I continued to weep.
I kept watch for hours,
So silent and still,
And we both shivered
From the cold evening's chill.
I didn't want to leave
On that cold, dark night,
This guardian of honor
So willing to fight.
Then the soldier rolled over,
With a voice soft and pure,
Whispered, "Carry on Santa,
It's Christmas Day, all is secure."
One look at my watch,
And I knew he was right.
"Merry Christmas my friend,
And to all a good night."
*Thank you for the touching forward Bob, Frankfort, Kentucky*
12.22.2006
Christmas Just Wasn't the Same...
It was supposed to be a happy time, but it wasn't. Santa was really pissed. It was Christmas eve and NOTHING was going right. Mrs. Claus had burned all the Christmas cookies. The Elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had put in while making toys, and the reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and were dead drunk. They had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and crashed it into a tree, breaking off one of the runners.
Santa was beside himself with anger. "I CAN"T believe it! I've got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours from now and all my reindeer are drunk, my Elves are on strike and I don't even have a Christmas tree! I sent that stupid Little Angel out HOURS ago to find a tree and he isn't even back yet! What am I going to do?"
Just then the Little Angel opened the front door and stepped in from the snowy night, dragging a Christmas tree. He says: "Yo, Santa, where do you want me to stick the Christmas Tree this year???"
And thus the tradition of Angels perched on top of the Christmas trees came to pass. . . .
Santa was beside himself with anger. "I CAN"T believe it! I've got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours from now and all my reindeer are drunk, my Elves are on strike and I don't even have a Christmas tree! I sent that stupid Little Angel out HOURS ago to find a tree and he isn't even back yet! What am I going to do?"
Just then the Little Angel opened the front door and stepped in from the snowy night, dragging a Christmas tree. He says: "Yo, Santa, where do you want me to stick the Christmas Tree this year???"
And thus the tradition of Angels perched on top of the Christmas trees came to pass. . . .
12.21.2006
Twas' the Lawyer's Night Before Christmas
**WHEREAS**, on or about the night immediately preceding Christmas, there did occur at a certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter "the House") a general lack of stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not limited to, a mouse.
A variety of foot apparel, e.g., stockings, socks, etc., had been affixed by and around the chimney in said house, in a diligent and workmanlike manner, in the hope and/or belief that St. Nick a/k/a/ St.Nicholas d/b/a/ Santa Claus (hereinafter "Claus") would arrive forthwith.
The minor residents, i.e., children, of the aforementioned House were situated on or about their individual beds and were engaged in hallucinations, i.e., dreams, wherein visions of confectionery treats, including, but not limited to, candies, nuts, and/or sugarplums, did dance, cavort, frolic, and otherwise appear in said dreams.
Whereupon I (hereinafter "the party of the first part"), being the joint-owner in fee simple of the House with Mamma (hereinafter "the party of the second part"), and the party of the second part had retired for a sustained period of sleep and/or rest. At such time, the parties were clad in various forms of sleepwear and head gear, e.g., kerchief and/or cap.
Suddenly, and without prior notice or warning, there did occur upon the unimproved real property adjacent and appurtenant to said House, i.e., the lawn, a certain aural disruption of unknown origin, nature, cause or circumstance, that did interfere with the parties' quiet enjoyment of said property, so much so that the party of the first part did precipitously proceed to a near window of said House to investigate the cause of such disturbance.
At that time, the party of the first part did observe, with some degree of confusion, wonder and/or disbelief, a miniature sleigh (hereinafter"the Vehicle") being pulled, propelled and/or drawn by approximately eight (8) diminutive reindeer. The driver of the Vehicle appeared to be, and in fact was, the previously referenced Claus.
Said Claus did then provide specific direction, instruction and/or guidance to the approximately eight (8) reindeer and, thus, expressly identified the antlered co-conspirators by name: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen ("hereinafter "the Deer"). Upon information and belief, it is further averred that an additional co-conspirator named "Rudolph" may have been involved.
The party of the first part witnessed Claus, the Vehicle, and the Deer did intentionally, willfully, and with reckless disregard for the safety of the occupants therein, trespass upon the roofs of several residences located adjacent to and in the vicinity of the House, and noted that the Vehicle was heavily laden with merchandise, packages, toys, and other items of unknown origin or nature.
Suddenly, and without invitation, permission or license, either express or implied, the Vehicle arrived at the House, and Claus did break and enter said House via the chimney. Said Claus was clad in a red, fur-trimmed suit, which was partially covered with charred residue from the interior of the chimney, and he carried a large sack with which he conveyed, transported or, otherwise, asported or carried a portion of the aforementioned merchandise, packages, toys, and other unknown items. He was smoking what appeared to be tobacco in a small pipe in blatant, open and notorious violation of local ordinances and public health regulations.
Claus did not speak, but immediately began to fill the aforementioned pre-hung stockings of the minor children with toys, and other small objects, however, said items do not constitute "gifts" as that term is defined in the applicable provisions of the U.S. Tax Code. Upon completion of such task, Claus touched the side of his nose and flew, rose and/or ascended up the chimney of the House to the roof where the Vehicle and Deer conspired and waited and/or served as "lookouts" to further aid and abet the alleged nefarious enterprise.
Claus then immediately fled and/or departed for an unknown destination. However,prior to said departure of the Vehicle, Deer, and Claus from the House, the party of the first part did hear Claus state and/or exclaim:
**"Merry Christmas to All, and to All a Good Night!"**, or words to that effect.
*Thanks Tom B., Frankfort, KY for the forward!
A variety of foot apparel, e.g., stockings, socks, etc., had been affixed by and around the chimney in said house, in a diligent and workmanlike manner, in the hope and/or belief that St. Nick a/k/a/ St.Nicholas d/b/a/ Santa Claus (hereinafter "Claus") would arrive forthwith.
The minor residents, i.e., children, of the aforementioned House were situated on or about their individual beds and were engaged in hallucinations, i.e., dreams, wherein visions of confectionery treats, including, but not limited to, candies, nuts, and/or sugarplums, did dance, cavort, frolic, and otherwise appear in said dreams.
Whereupon I (hereinafter "the party of the first part"), being the joint-owner in fee simple of the House with Mamma (hereinafter "the party of the second part"), and the party of the second part had retired for a sustained period of sleep and/or rest. At such time, the parties were clad in various forms of sleepwear and head gear, e.g., kerchief and/or cap.
Suddenly, and without prior notice or warning, there did occur upon the unimproved real property adjacent and appurtenant to said House, i.e., the lawn, a certain aural disruption of unknown origin, nature, cause or circumstance, that did interfere with the parties' quiet enjoyment of said property, so much so that the party of the first part did precipitously proceed to a near window of said House to investigate the cause of such disturbance.
At that time, the party of the first part did observe, with some degree of confusion, wonder and/or disbelief, a miniature sleigh (hereinafter"the Vehicle") being pulled, propelled and/or drawn by approximately eight (8) diminutive reindeer. The driver of the Vehicle appeared to be, and in fact was, the previously referenced Claus.
Said Claus did then provide specific direction, instruction and/or guidance to the approximately eight (8) reindeer and, thus, expressly identified the antlered co-conspirators by name: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen ("hereinafter "the Deer"). Upon information and belief, it is further averred that an additional co-conspirator named "Rudolph" may have been involved.
The party of the first part witnessed Claus, the Vehicle, and the Deer did intentionally, willfully, and with reckless disregard for the safety of the occupants therein, trespass upon the roofs of several residences located adjacent to and in the vicinity of the House, and noted that the Vehicle was heavily laden with merchandise, packages, toys, and other items of unknown origin or nature.
Suddenly, and without invitation, permission or license, either express or implied, the Vehicle arrived at the House, and Claus did break and enter said House via the chimney. Said Claus was clad in a red, fur-trimmed suit, which was partially covered with charred residue from the interior of the chimney, and he carried a large sack with which he conveyed, transported or, otherwise, asported or carried a portion of the aforementioned merchandise, packages, toys, and other unknown items. He was smoking what appeared to be tobacco in a small pipe in blatant, open and notorious violation of local ordinances and public health regulations.
Claus did not speak, but immediately began to fill the aforementioned pre-hung stockings of the minor children with toys, and other small objects, however, said items do not constitute "gifts" as that term is defined in the applicable provisions of the U.S. Tax Code. Upon completion of such task, Claus touched the side of his nose and flew, rose and/or ascended up the chimney of the House to the roof where the Vehicle and Deer conspired and waited and/or served as "lookouts" to further aid and abet the alleged nefarious enterprise.
Claus then immediately fled and/or departed for an unknown destination. However,prior to said departure of the Vehicle, Deer, and Claus from the House, the party of the first part did hear Claus state and/or exclaim:
**"Merry Christmas to All, and to All a Good Night!"**, or words to that effect.
*Thanks Tom B., Frankfort, KY for the forward!
12.20.2006
Fw: Holiday Do You Know Me...
1. Egg nog or hot chocolate?
Egg nog bourbon punch. It packs a wallop and allows me to bear spending the holidays with entire family...
2. Does Santa wrap presents or just set them under the tree?
Wrapped under the tree, as I have a tendency to peek.
3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? I
Colored? Too retro. All white darling.
4. Do you hang mistletoe?
Yes. Picked up this tradition from T's family. Nothing like making out with him in front of 50 relatives at annual holiday fete to turn him bright red!
5. When do you put your decorations up?
If I have time, the first week or so of December.
6. What is your favorite holiday dish?
Tie: My mother's Spinach Madeline and my father's homemade gumbo.
7. Favorite holiday memory as a child:
The year my father built me a dollhouse in the dining room. He wouldn't let me in there for a week while he put it all together.
8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
I figured it out when I found my mum's holiday stash. I don't know--age 6 or 7?
9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
Not normally. Maybe if with one portion of family that we won't get to see on Christmas day.
10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
Special ornaments we collect in our travels or from friends & family, with shiny red or gold balls to bring consistency.
11. Snow! Love it or dread it?
Great for skiing; cruddy for getting to work. (I'm from the deep south people. 50 degrees is artic. We are not snow people...)
12. Can you ice skate?
Yes, but very poorly. Adds to my bruise collection.
13. Do you remember your favorite gift?
Dollhouse and diamond necklace from T. from Tiffany's; any gift from my Mother--her gifts are always thoughtful and sentimental.
14. What’s the most important thing about the holidays for you?
Quality family time. And drinking. Can't forget the drinking.
15. What is your favorite holiday dessert?
Bread pudding, but that's not exactly Christmassy...that's just the time of year when I usually break down and eat it.
16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
Decorating the tree (esp. if with family and or friends); midnight church services.
17. What tops your tree?
A sterling silver cross...I broke my angel. Oops.
18. Which do you prefer, giving or receiving?
Giving. Hands down.
19. What is your favorite Christmas song?
"Baby It's Cold Outside."
20. Candy canes! Yuck or yum?
Love the soft candy canes--I think they are called "Bob's"--they have the lion on the container...
21. Favorite Christmas movie:
It's a Wonderful Life, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, White Christmas, Holiday Inn--the norms.
22. Favorite Christmas Cartoon:
A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph
*Thank you for the Christmas cheer Scarlet! Chicago, Illinois*
Egg nog bourbon punch. It packs a wallop and allows me to bear spending the holidays with entire family...
2. Does Santa wrap presents or just set them under the tree?
Wrapped under the tree, as I have a tendency to peek.
3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? I
Colored? Too retro. All white darling.
4. Do you hang mistletoe?
Yes. Picked up this tradition from T's family. Nothing like making out with him in front of 50 relatives at annual holiday fete to turn him bright red!
5. When do you put your decorations up?
If I have time, the first week or so of December.
6. What is your favorite holiday dish?
Tie: My mother's Spinach Madeline and my father's homemade gumbo.
7. Favorite holiday memory as a child:
The year my father built me a dollhouse in the dining room. He wouldn't let me in there for a week while he put it all together.
8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
I figured it out when I found my mum's holiday stash. I don't know--age 6 or 7?
9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
Not normally. Maybe if with one portion of family that we won't get to see on Christmas day.
10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
Special ornaments we collect in our travels or from friends & family, with shiny red or gold balls to bring consistency.
11. Snow! Love it or dread it?
Great for skiing; cruddy for getting to work. (I'm from the deep south people. 50 degrees is artic. We are not snow people...)
12. Can you ice skate?
Yes, but very poorly. Adds to my bruise collection.
13. Do you remember your favorite gift?
Dollhouse and diamond necklace from T. from Tiffany's; any gift from my Mother--her gifts are always thoughtful and sentimental.
14. What’s the most important thing about the holidays for you?
Quality family time. And drinking. Can't forget the drinking.
15. What is your favorite holiday dessert?
Bread pudding, but that's not exactly Christmassy...that's just the time of year when I usually break down and eat it.
16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
Decorating the tree (esp. if with family and or friends); midnight church services.
17. What tops your tree?
A sterling silver cross...I broke my angel. Oops.
18. Which do you prefer, giving or receiving?
Giving. Hands down.
19. What is your favorite Christmas song?
"Baby It's Cold Outside."
20. Candy canes! Yuck or yum?
Love the soft candy canes--I think they are called "Bob's"--they have the lion on the container...
21. Favorite Christmas movie:
It's a Wonderful Life, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, White Christmas, Holiday Inn--the norms.
22. Favorite Christmas Cartoon:
A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph
*Thank you for the Christmas cheer Scarlet! Chicago, Illinois*
12.10.2006
12.08.2006
Holiday Party Excuse Generator
Holiday Party Excuse Generator
What: You describe the undesirable soiree; it whips up a thanks-but-no-thanks letter.
Why: You may be excused.
Where: Online at holiday.enlighten.com.
*Great Idea care of www.dailycandy.com.
What: You describe the undesirable soiree; it whips up a thanks-but-no-thanks letter.
Why: You may be excused.
Where: Online at holiday.enlighten.com.
*Great Idea care of www.dailycandy.com.
12.07.2006
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